


nexus

by Walker_August



Category: Prospect (2018)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Family Bonding, Gen, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 09:21:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29311749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Walker_August/pseuds/Walker_August
Summary: After the events on the Green Moon, Cee tries to heal without entirely knowing how.
Relationships: Cee & Ezra (Prospect 2018)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 20





	nexus

Cee doesn’t expect Ezra to stay.

She has been let down by adults her whole life; the mother she couldn’t even mourn having never known her. Teachers who ignored her interests and barely seemed to care. And a father who even if on some level he did love her at some point, she believes would’ve traded her with the Sater for aurelac if he had been there instead.

So, despite what they have been through she can’t let herself expect much of the man. 

To begin with things are the same, they are comfortable, and while he recovers in bed Cee begins to read to him her writing as she had promised she would. Yet after their short time in the sick bay he seems quickly to withdraw from the growing friendship and unsurprised she prepares to be alone – truly alone this time. Alone with her fear and her guilt, remembering the moments of terror on the Green and wondering why she barely misses her father.

After they are as healed as they will likely ever be, Cee and Ezra sit side by side in a canteen on the Pug and there is silence. She wants to talk to him. To ask for his help because despite, or perhaps because of it all she trusts him. Trusts he could understand her and help make sense of it. But he is not the same spirited man who helped her get off that toxic moon, whose curious thoughts never ceased to flow. Now the man is pallid and tired, stretched thin and perhaps selfishly she thinks it is time for him to let her down too.

The same evening, then, she begins to pack the few possessions that remain while Ezra takes a walk to look out at the stars as he does sometimes. It’s easier this way, Cee thinks. Easier to leave him to it with his half of the credits so they can wallow in their shared but so distinctly separate traumas in different parts of the universe. She isn’t scared of surviving on her own, it felt for quite some time that she was doing just that even before. Without shared affinity the familial relationship between her and her father felt barely there. Not like Ezra, because when she had finally let him in and given her trust she felt kinship. But not understanding fully, Cee thinks that was left on the Green.

When he returns they say their goodnights and she nudges the pack under her cot, settling in to be bombarded with those same guilty, confused thoughts as most nights. For a while it’s quiet as they both fight to succumb to their tiredness but eventually she hears Ezra snore and even if their time is over she is glad that he manages these few hours of sleep, he needs it more than anything. She huffs a low laugh at the gentle purr-like snore of the man she had at first thought menacing, before pulling out her book and flicking on the dim reading light to continue the ideas she had been jotting down daily, continuing the story of The Streamer Girl so she does not have to think of her own.

It’s still early when she decides it’s time. Quickly tying back her hair and shouldering the pack. Purposefully burdening herself with the prospect of nothing but her own company for the next while because, as she reminds herself, it’s easier. Easier than weighing down someone else who would rather she not be there. Cee can’t see past that because she feels like it’s all she has known for these last several years. Looking to his dark corner of the room she smiles gentle and silently wishes the best to the strange man she had grown so fond of before she leaves to scan the boards for a departure to her destination of choice. 

The girl is sitting on a bench waiting for the transport and reluctantly chewing down a bits bar - she’d had enough of them in her life already – when the familiar gait and distinct blonde patch catch her eye as Ezra approaches her. He looks better rested but still drawn and some emotion catches in her throat at the sight. She realises she’s even more attached to him than she first thought. He sits besides her and says nothing for a moment and even though the station is buzzing it feels too quiet.

“Getting ready to take flight, little bird?” Ezra asks eventually, if anything sounding amused at the situation.

Cee nods, mousy unwashed strand of hair shaking loose and falling against her face. She brushes it back behind her ear and turns to look at him finally.

“I’m sorry, Ezra,” she admits to him “I didn’t know how to tell you, I didn’t want to make you feel guilty too”

“What do you mean?”

She hesitates when he asks for explanation. Surely he knows.

“I appreciate you looking out for me and everything you’ve done but… it- it feels like you need space and I don’t want to burden you when you’re…” She trails off and motions to his missing right arm, and to the unseen wounds within, “healing”

“Oh birdie,” he sighs in response, kindly smiling down at the young girl “Cee. There’s no burden in having your friendship, and I’m grateful for your company even when it doesn’t seem that way. If anything, I should offer my apologies for my doleful demeanour lately. But without your kind company and conversation I wouldn’t have survived it, and for that and...everything else you’ve helped me with I feel a bond between us that I’d rather not break”

It’s here that Ezra offers Cee, for the first time ever, a hug. Arm slowly coming to rest on her shoulder, barely touching in case she wants to shake him off but instead she feels herself become overwhelmed by it, sobs barely audibly and lets him pull her in to such a warm, and caring embrace that tells her she is not alone.

Finally she realises, there is someone who cares for her.

“It seems we both still have healing to do” he mutters, squeezing her shoulder lightly, “I hope you know you can always talk with me. If you remember, I’m fairly fond of it”

“Thank you” she whispers, wiping the stray tear from her cheek before moving to sit back. Ezra watches as she looks to the gate where the transport will be, seemingly trying to decide something.

“Where is it you’re planning to go?” the man queries curiously

“Camria” is all she says but it’s wistful and full of thought

“Camria” he repeats, before setting down the pack at his feet that she hadn’t noticed before, “And would you like some company, little bird?”

“Ok” Cee nods, needing barely a moment to contemplate the offer, grin forming at the gesture. 

He didn’t even know where she would go, could’ve been back to the moon for all he knows, but he was willing to follow rather than lose her.

For the first time in a long time, Cee’s expectations are exceeded.


End file.
